Lit crit of the week, #2

"Oh, fuck, not another elf!"
(J.R.R. Tolkein's friend Hugo Dyson, while Tolkein was reading him the final instalment of The Lord of The Rings)

An Apology

It's no life for a book, sitting under the legs of my table to bring it to an ergonomic height. Apologies to Nick Hornby, John O'Farrell, Michael Bracewell,Wang Shuo, Bernhard Schlink, and several others. I actually enjoyed several of these books, notwithstanding the humiliating position I placed them in afterwards. I am not a barbarian. In general, I care for books. I carefully protect them from the other contents in my bag. I was brought up to abhor people who put books down spread open at the page with the spine upwards.

I have a proper desk now. These books have been released from their burden. Some have already reached the charity shop in Spitalfields, where they will now begin new lives, and find appreciative owners with well-dusted bookshelves.